Cut out all these exclamation points. An exclamation point is like laughing at your own joke.

I know some of the best Dolly Parton jokes. I made ‚em up myself.

Meditation is a state of mind which looks at everything with complete attention, totally, not just parts of it. And no one can teach you how to be attentive. If any system teaches you how to be attentive, then you are attentive to the system, and that is not attention.

If it’s a penny for your thoughts and you put in your two cents worth, then someone, somewhere is making a penny.

It is not funny that anything else should fall down; only that a man should fall down. Why do we laugh? Because it is a gravely religious matter: it is the Fall of Man. Only man can be absurd: for only man can be dignified.

We must be our own before we can be another’s.

Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing that it is not fish they are after.

Men don’t care what’s on TV. They only care what else is on TV.

Do not try to live forever. You will not succeed.

I felt I had to solve everyone’s problems.

If Everton were playing down the bottom of my garden, I’d draw the curtains.

The idea of recognising your strengths and using them in as versatile a way as you can is cool to me.

A man who is not afraid is not aggressive, a man who has no sense of fear of any kind is really a free, a peaceful man.

And obviously, from our own personal point of view, the principal challenge is a personal challenge.

As a human being, anger is a part of our mind. Irritation also part of our mind. But you can do – anger come, go. Never keep in your sort of – your inner world, then create a lot of suspicion, a lot of distrust, a lot of negative things, more worry.

Do not laugh much or often or unrestrainedly.

Intense feeling too often obscures the truth.

I’m considered wise, and sometimes I see myself as knowing. Most of the time, I see myself as wanting to know. And I see myself as a very interested person. I’ve never been bored in my life.

Labor to keep alive in your breast that little spark of celestial fire, called conscience.

God didn’t make me to make movies, flex muscles, buy gold. What you love the most becomes your God… If I never make another dollar, my life is complete.

I’m 31 now. I think I’m beginning to understand what life is, what romance is, and what a relationship means.

I think there is a sense of being forced at this time to look at America’s really large shadow and that’s not all that bad.

I always try to do as much as I can do. I’m never a person that does not enough, because I’d regret not doing enough and think I probably could have done more. I probably go too far and have to reel myself back in, which works in some things, and other things it doesn’t work.

In the child, consciousness rises out of the depths of unconscious psychic life, at first like separate islands, which gradually unite to form a ‚continent,‘ a continuous landmass of consciousness. Progressive mental development means, in effect, extension of consciousness.

Unlike some politicians, I can admit to a mistake.

The worst way of flying, I think, is standby. It never works. That’s why they call it standby. You end up standing there going, ‚Bye!‘

That’s the biggest gift I can give anybody: ‚Wake up, be aware of who you are, what you’re doing and what you can do to prevent yourself from becoming ill.‘

I have no special talent. I am only passionately curious.

I’m odd looking. Sometimes I think I look like a funny muppet.

When you start to realise how much of what you’ve constructed of yourself is based on deception and lies, that is a horrifying realisation.

I don’t like magic – but I have been known to make guys disappear.

I’ve got a great sense of humor.

I like George Carlin’s jokes. I like his humor. He’s one of my heroes, and I like what he did with talking about everyday things.

The fact is I am not having sex. But I feel absolutely ripe for the, what would you say? plucking?

Fear doesn’t exist anywhere except in the mind.

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.

Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves.

You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger.

Remember that your imagination is yours and yours alone. You have the inborn capacity to use it in any way that you choose. No one else is responsible for your imagination. Anything placed in your imagination and held there ultimately becomes your reality.

I am not ashamed to confess that I am ignorant of what I do not know.

Do you know what you call those who use towels and never wash them, eat meals and never do the dishes, sit in rooms they never clean, and are entertained till they drop? If you have just answered, ‚A house guest,‘ you’re wrong because I have just described my kids.

The only way I’d be caught without makeup is if my radio fell in the bathtub while I was taking a bath and electrocuted me and I was in between makeup at home. I hope my husband would slap a little lipstick on me before he took me to the morgue.

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who would want to live in an institution?

I’d like to believe that the people that have supported me in my work or identified with me in films, the people that feel they know me, they do and they don’t have misconceptions – they understand. I believe that.

Always be sincere, even if you don’t mean it.

Real life is the life that’s in you, not your circumstances, like where you live or what job you have or who you’re in relationship with.

I’m aware that, whatever the circumstances, there will always be speculation about me.

The self is hateful.

I like the app where you can make your own memes. I make memes all the time and send them to my friends.

You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.

I’m screamingly funny, you know, I really am in the books. And that helps because I’m funnier than a lot of people, I think, and that’s appreciated by young people.

Many people know so little about what is beyond their short range of experience. They look within themselves – and find nothing! Therefore they conclude that there is nothing outside themselves either.

There are phases in life which surface at times, and it makes you understand that despite you working hard, everything what you are doing is probably not enough. That’s when you need to look around, and beyond.

You can always cope with the present moment, but you cannot cope with something that is only a mind projection – you cannot cope with the future.

If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.

Little things affect little minds.

Modesty is a learned affectation. And as soon as life slams the modest person against the wall, that modesty drops.

Whatever one of us blames in another, each one will find in his own heart.

My only fault is that I don’t realize how great I really am.

If you are going to write, say, fantasy – stop reading fantasy. You’ve already read too much. Read other things; read westerns, read history, read anything that seems interesting, because if you only read fantasy and then you start to write fantasy, all you’re going to do is recycle the same old stuff and move it around a bit.

Association with human beings lures one into self-observation.