That’s what a man wants in a wife, mostly; he wants to make sure one fool tells him he’s wise.

A man is great by deeds, not by birth.

The proper study of Mankind is Man.

The virtue of justice consists in moderation, as regulated by wisdom.

Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.

The teacher is the one who gets the most out of the lessons, and the true teacher is the learner.

Lovers often invest their first meetings with retrospective significance, as if to try to conjure the elements of the numinous out of the stubborn witness of the everyday.

We know accurately only when we know little, with knowledge doubt increases.

A little learning is a dangerous thing, but we must take that risk because a little is as much as our biggest heads can hold.

I’ve had moments when I’ve thought about somebody, picked up the phone to call them and they are on the line already, and I think that maybe there’s some vibration, some connection.

Nothing is more terrible than activity without insight.

I desire no future that will break the ties with the past.

In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.

If I had only one sermon to preach it would be a sermon against pride.

The object of opening the mind, as of opening the mouth, is to shut it again on something solid.

Step with care and great tact, and remember that Life’s a Great Balancing Act.

The cleverest of all, in my opinion, is the man who calls himself a fool at least once a month.

I wouldn’t say that anyone in fashion is on my side. I don’t think there’s anyone on my side.

The person who doesn’t scatter the morning dew will not comb gray hairs.

The world is round so that friendship may encircle it.

Wishing to be friends is quick work, but friendship is a slow ripening fruit.

Earnestness is enthusiasm tempered by reason.

It’s probably the worst feeling in the world, when you’re deeply and madly in love with a woman and you know she’s not feeling you the same way, and you don’t know why.

‚Tis strange what a man may do, and a woman yet think him an angel.

Husbands never become good; they merely become proficient.

We should not fret for what is past, nor should we be anxious about the future; men of discernment deal only with the present moment.

Be slow to fall into friendship; but when thou art in, continue firm and constant.

Sure, I can get a little bit jealous. The good part about jealousy is that it comes from passion. It’s also the dangerous part and it’s an ugly emotion that hurts.

How prone to doubt, how cautious are the wise!

Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.

Every man is a damn fool for at least five minutes every day; wisdom consists in not exceeding the limit.

My wife, a schoolteacher, very disciplined. If you think I’m tough, trust me, and wait till you see when the children are on the naughty step. It’s hilarious. So we decided that I’m going to work like a donkey and provide amazing support for the family.

Never pretend to a love which you do not actually feel, for love is not ours to command.

I used to live with my grandmother. I used to wonder why the other kids in school went home with their mothers and fathers. I wanted to be the guy that got married. I wanted to be the guy with the children and the white picket fence. I never had that.

It’s annoying, but justice and equality are mates. Aren’t they? Justice always wants to hang out with equality. And equality is a real pain.

Experience teaches us that it is much easier to prevent an enemy from posting themselves than it is to dislodge them after they have got possession.

Beauty is mysterious as well as terrible. God and devil are fighting there, and the battlefield is the heart of man.

Knowledge is true opinion.

I used to read five psalms every day – that teaches me how to get along with God. Then I read a chapter of Proverbs every day and that teaches me how to get along with my fellow man.

If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.

The wit knows that his place is at the tail of a procession.

Wood burns because it has the proper stuff in it; and a man becomes famous because he has the proper stuff in him.

Relationships are the hallmark of the mature person.

There is nothing, Sir, too little for so little a creature as man. It is by studying little things that we attain the great art of having as little misery and as much happiness as possible.

As a blind man has no idea of colors, so have we no idea of the manner by which the all-wise God perceives and understands all things.

If you burn your neighbors house down, it doesn’t make your house look any better.

I feel that there is nothing more truly artistic than to love people.

It has been hard for me to find it, but I have found love.

People are like dirt. They can either nourish you and help you grow as a person or they can stunt your growth and make you wilt and die.

Our best thoughts come from others.

Men are April when they woo, December when they wed. Maids are May when they are maids, but the sky changes when they are wives.

It feels good to have your work respected again.

Never injure a friend, even in jest.

Learning without thought is labor lost; thought without learning is perilous.

Arthur Miller wouldn’t have married me if I had been nothing but a dumb blonde.

Wisdom stands at the turn in the road and calls upon us publicly, but we consider it false and despise its adherents.

To this day, some of my closest friends say, ‚Gaga, you know, everything’s great. You’re a singer; your dreams have come true.‘ But, still, when certain things are said to you over and over again as you’re growing up, it stays with you and you wonder if they’re true.

Bachelors have consciences, married men have wives.

Self-pity is our worst enemy and if we yield to it, we can never do anything wise in this world.

Before we acquire great power we must acquire wisdom to use it well.

There was one incident at a movie theater where my girl got mad at these guys who were talking behind us. I never looked back there, but she was like, ‚Will you all just shut up!‘ And I just got up and moved three rows in front. She was like, ‚What are you doing?!‘ I was like, ‚You better get up here! I don’t play the fighting games.‘